{anatomist}

links and measles and the drink for the summer

last summer was cucumber mojitos, this summer the flavor is vanilla and lavender gin martinis.

i love etsy, and i really like this sampling of art.

i like the ladies that put this together and it looks like an entertaining distraction for the breeders (or potential breeders) out there.

in personal news, i just got my first of two measles shots that i need before they will let me into the crowded germ infested university. it hurt, and made me feel, once again, like an ass for making my poor baby get shots every couple of weeks for the first year and a half of his life. it was for his own good (maybe) yada, yada, but whatever, the shit hurts and my job is to keep him from getting hurt so i=asshole.

babyproof.

my head is too full and i am too exhausted to rehash the last few days (summary: tired no-nap toddler, a house full of breakables, a mom who didn't think to bring any toys and an unfenced yard that ends in a cliff.) so instead i will pick out some of the things i have found on the internet.

1. a great link about how to get through the day with a toddler. and it starts with finding a field and letting them run around, my absolute go-to on a rough day with good weather.

2. for the crafty ones, a site with free downloadable clothing patterns and lots of pictures of the things that people are making. so fantastic.

3. the new camera i am getting (through a funny little turn of events, i am able to get a crazy awesome camera, but i can't afford to go out and get a drink. but i'm sure not complaining!). it should get here next week and then i am going to go nuts with it. and by that i sort of mean i will get completely overwhelmed by it and just stare at it for a while. and then i will have to figure out a way to keep it out of jack's hands.

aaaand, i guess that is all. i need a nap desperately, and the kid does not have a good track record for staying asleep so i am getting off the webs and passing out.

my son is a wreck

my son is an adorable, sweet, hilarious, good natured wreck, but a wreck all the same. in the past couple of weeks he's had a twisted ankle, chomped lip, many, many stubbed toes, many, many smacking of skulls against hard things, and teeth, oh the teeth he has coming in way back there. it is ridiculous. but despite the occasional crappy mood and sleepless night, he is taking it all in stride and now he has something like 30 words that he uses and he stomps around and bobs his head to the music and i absolutely adore him.

it will almost be hard to leave him in preschool when i go back to work and school.

almost.

in other news, i went kayaking in lake washington last night and it was amazing. i am pretty sure i have figured out what i am going to be doing every free minute of this summer. it felt so good to get out on the water and use those muscles again. the physical memory of paddling was so strong and i felt like a little kid again playing in the waves. 

on a roll

so it seems that i haven't got any good stories to tell, only mental lists of things to do, things that i've done, things that stress me out, things that make life exciting and wonderful. so instead of forcing a half-assed narrative, i'll just give you a glimpse:

1. our garden is looking great, the tomatoes are a little wobbly and the birds are eating our strawberries, but everything is still alive and that is my real goal this year. tom and jack go out every evening and water the garden and it seems to be teaching jack that plants need to be loved and not mauled.

2. speaking of mauled, jack bi the shit out of his lip yesterday. he must have had a lot of lip in his mouth when he fell because he has a nasty bite bruise on almost all the way down to his chin. it was pretty bloody and traumatizing yesterday and he is talking a bit crooked today but seems to be mostly recovered. 

3. i painted the kitchen (the green color you can see on the wall in that picture.) i'm pretty pleased with it (i was pretty tired of the orange) but now i want to prime and paint the rest of the house. i was up until 3 am finishing the kitchen, so i am afraid i won't be getting any sleep for a while.

4. i got an acceptance letter from the university! now i just need to figure out how to pay for school. if anyone has tips (specific ones, not just "scholarships" but "i heard about _____ scholarship that is still taking applications and seems like something you would qualify for" ) i would love to hear them. i've applied for aid, and followed a few leads, but for some reason i didn't think i was going to get into school, and thought i wouldn't be able to afford it if i did. but when i got the letter everything in my head changed and now i am de-f*cking-termined to go in the fall. 

5. my son would really like to destroy my computer so i ought to hide it before he manages. enjoy your thursday!

holy yesterday

i've been pretty lazy all week, not wanting to leave the house, making macaroni for junior's lunch every day, with the exception of my insane drive to get the backyard cleaned up (forcing t to haul lumber until past midnight one night) i haven't been motivated to do anything.

so khya and i made plans to have a crafty slumber party on friday night. i was going to make a couple of butter chicken recipes (i'm on a search for awesome butter chicken and i think i might have found what i am looking for. of course i can't stand the smell of garam masala right now after 5 hours in the kitchen with it so i have to wait a while to make it again.)

friday morning my neighbor called me and asked if i wanted to go yardsaling with her and her son. we tossed the kids into the double stroller and hiked around for a couple of hours, found some great deals on things i've been looking for (mostly blankets for jack, just in time for summer!) and stopped for gyros and ice cream on the way back, bar stools pulled up to a newspaper box in the shade, enjoying the perfect greenwood day.

by the time we got home it was way past junior's naptime, so he wasn't awake yet when our friends showed up to play. i had just enough time to put together the marinade before everyone showed up and piles of toddlers ran around the yard, playing on the swings and watering the garden (i've found the only way to stop jack from pulling out the plants is by letting him overwater them.).

the afternoon was awesome, warm sun streaming in the windows, good food cooking, happy kids running around, fun people relaxing into the weekend, and we ate dinner in our new outdoor dining room while finn lay in the grass waiting for leftovers. 

it was idilic.

and then jack ran across the lawn and tripped in a hole and twisted his ankle and everything spiraled downhill. jack couldn't walk, he and sol were both overtired, the bath terrified sol, going to bed freaked jack out, and when we tried to put them in the same room, they both got hysterical and as far as i can tell, jack was so upset and then so concerned about sol being upset that he hyperventilated. short heaving breaths, his head twitching with each one, his eyes wide with fear. it was one of the worst moments of my life and i cannot imagine how he felt. 

so we gave up on that plan, jack spent some time outside, sol moved into jack's crib and fussed to sleep quickly. then tom and jack went to bed while khya and i tried to drink away the trauma.

of course, i should have gone right to bed because jack woke every hour crying from the pain in his foot.

it was one hell of a day.

jack and i are both feeling better now though since i decided to go thrifting while tom took a nap and i found one of these $300 bikes for $30 at our local clusterf*ck thriftstore!

this summer is going to rule.

a plea for help (from anyone who still reads this poor neglected blog)

(this post brought to you by my son's first exposure to sesame street. i think it is love.)

thing 1.

as you know, i've been learning to cook (i guess all my posts have been food or baby related for the last, oh i don't know, year? two years? damn, i really have to branch out.) we've got our repertoire of go-to meals, and i experiment based on my daily cravings, but since i started trying to cut down on the wheat in our diet i have run into a bit of a block. taking pasta and bread off the list really cuts down on the meals i can make, so i need your help.

as it stand i usually made: burritos/tacos/enchiladas, rice with beans and veggies and yumm sauce (imported from eugene, if anyone wants to open up a seattle franchise i would be a regular customer), eggs or (wheat free) pancakes for breakfast, phad thai, green curry and peppers (tom's speciality), chieken and rice, flank steak and peanut sauce, anything with peanut sauce, and when the weather is nice and i can't think of anything, tom makes meat on the grill and slices up some tomatoes and avocado. 

it is a pretty limited (albeit tasty) selection. please help.

thing 2. 

i am trying to find a job and have realized that i need to expand and specialize my skillset. i know that all you people have a wide variety of interests and expertise, what do you think i would be interested in and good at?what things do you wish you knew how to do? what skills do you see being most in demand right now? i am totally open to going any direction at this point so throw them at me. 

thing 3.

i planted a garden last week. we have lettuce and tomatoes and basil and cilantro and peppers and cucumbers and strawberries and mint and rosemary. i'm going to add lavender, more peppers, witch hazel (when i finally find one, i have feelers out though, apparently they are touch to get after st patricks day.) and i have a bed made of pressure treated wood that is going to be full of wildflowers, if i can find a decent native wildflower mix. i'll let you know how it all goes.

as usual, ending with a photo:

this is what happens when you take the camera away from junior.

getting older, warmer

the last one is a picture that jack took of me. i suppose this is how i look to him most of the time. interesting.

cinco de mayo

tonight i will drink a fancy peach flavored homebrew instead of tequila.

cinco de mayo is a strange holiday for me, i know very little about it really, but in my world it marks the anniversary of the day (11 years ago) when i left eugene in a pick up truck with my boyfriend's best friend and some stolen money and moved to colorado. none of the rest of that story turned out all that well, but that day was amazing and life changing and i am pretty sure at this point that i will never forget sitting in that shitty hotel room watching westerns and drinking warm coronas.

it is also the anniversary of the day that my ex-boyfriend's brother killed himself. 

every may 5th i think about those two boys from my past, the older one and that amazing day. and the younger one, and the horrible sadness i know he feels every year at this time.

tonight i will drink a toast to both of them.

on our own

jack and i had a rockin road trip to the eug last week. we picked up liam and raven and had toddler heaven in the backseat with some dvds and travel packs of snacks and then jack and i went out to camp on evilcat's porch in the woods to celebrate snowball's birthday.

jack is a rad partier. he likes dancing and making fools out of the normally (somewhat) self-respecting boys/men who did a little baby-dancing of their own. wobbling around with their heads bobbing and their hands in fists by their heads. i love what children do to people. little z was a charmer, hugging jack and demanding that he bring her things. just the exact sort of friend his highness needs.

now we are back and t is at a conference in some god-awful town elsewhere in washington. i don't really know anything about any of the towns outside of seattle (with the exception of olympia, but my knowledge of that place is pretty much limited to the evergreen campus and a dock where my father used to live). 

we miss t. jack signs for dada every few hours and runs to the window to watch for him along with the dogs. we will all be thrilled when he gets home, i'll be running away to hide in my room and nurse my wounds as jack has decided that biting is the best way to let me know he is tired/hungry/cranky/wanting down/up/in need of a hug/really enthusiastic about my choice of music/etc. luckily he bites mostly on my tattoo arm so i can still wear short sleeves without anyone seeing the tiny teeth marks. 

not that there is really the option to wear short sleeves as the weather here is f-ing awful. i get so excited when the sun comes out and then these rainy days are twice as devastating.

in any case, we are still managing to venture out, yesterday we took a sunset walk up the street to get ice cream and i shared it with jack while he rode in the ergo. he was pretty happy strapped to my back, smiling face covered in ice cream. today was starting to look pretty nasty when i lay down for a nap just in time for him to have an early wake-up from his nap, leaving both of us tired and cranky. i tried coloring, cartoons, snacks, juice, dog-wrestling. finally i just strapped him to my back and we ran some errands and when he decided he wanted to walk, i took a deep breath and let him walk. and shockingly, it went well. he walked all the way home from the library and we stopped at the pub for some chicken strips (for him) and a beer (for me) and he behaved exactly like the quiet, entertained, charming little toddler that you always hope to have when you take a toddler into a restaurant. people didn't realize there was a baby in the bar until i went to pay the tab. it was a miracle.

it was also a miracle that i remembered to feed the dogs this evening. the poor things. sidney is getting picked up tomorrow to move to his new pad in portland. he will be so happy. i'm trying not to think about how jack will react, but i have explained the situation to him a couple of times and i am hoping that part of that makes sense to him. we'll see.

now some pictures.

jack learned to hike a football.. sort of

on a sunny day at the beach.

hot moment

jack isn't afraid of anything, not strangers, cars, big dogs, angry moms, nothing. except the hairdryer and the vacuum. sort of like a puppy. i don't really care that he is afraid of the hairdryer, he isn't likely to have enough hair, nor the desire, to use one, but the vacuum cleaner is a bit more of a problem as we have a LOT of dog hair around here. the other day i saw a suggestion (on some cleaning site. yeah. i read cleaning sites, f*ck off.) that toddlers can be helpful in cleaning the house and the vacuum is a fun way for them to chip in. so i thought i would work on making the vacuum a friend to small boys by making it look like fun. by dancing and singing like a fool while vacuuming the living room while jack, who was not going for it at all, hid behind the couch, eyes wide with fear. 

one wednesday i ordered new shoes, (i'm not posting any pictures because they are ugly. no, seriously, uggly. but they are comfortable and i seldom leave the house anyway so, again, f*ck off). since i ordered them from the best shoe seller ever (starts with a z ends with appos and has taken a huge chunk of my income in the last 8 years) the shipping was superfast. so fast that the ups man showed up on my door a mere 36 hours after i ordered them! 36 hours from 10 pm on wednesday night = 10 am on friday morning and precisely the hour that i was shaking my booty at the open window while vacuuming a clean wood floor and singing to a child that was very hidden from view. 

the delivery man didn't even bother knocking, just dropped the box and got out of there before the dogs even started barking.

yeah, we're cool.

happy day after easter

eggs! 

(the back two rows are blown eggs the innards of which made tasty little quiches, the front row are hardboiled.)

the quiches from the blown out eggs. with ham crusts. and mushrooms and goat cheese in the middle. 

(and because it is always fun to revisit this series...)

in the womb with scary bunny:

7 months old with scary bunny:

19 months old with extra-scary bunny (thanks celeste!):

two in one day

i heard someone died. a father who was disappointed in his daughter. i can't call and say i'm sorry, but i can't stop thinking it either. i worry that when my mother goes, she will believe that i am a bitch. i worry she won't realize that i love her as much as she loves me. 

i had no idea how much i could love until my baby appeared. but even now i can't love without frustration. i can never let my mind be still and just love, there is always something to build, spills to soak up, fabric to stitch together, ideas to be replaced with other ideas, detritus to be purged. there is always something more and no one can be my arms and legs, everyone moves with their own will and i am like frogger trying to cross the road and stream without being run over or drown. 

i am terrible at teamwork. i always thought i would make a great cult leader though. i am full of great ideas, but somehow i sought out people who don't want to be convinced to wear all white and wait for the aliens to come. now my great ideas are desperate attempts to get the team captain to pick me first but i am terrible at sports and they know it.

i'm good at what i do though, when i manage to do it. i can stitch fabric together, and i have grand plans and the words to sell them are rumbling around in my head taking form. but it is taking so much time and it is almost ten and i will have to go to bed then to wake up before dawn to feed the hungry little bird i hatched.

i am terrible at this whole blogger thing.

(see also: terrible at pet-owning, terrible at being quiet, terrible at fishing)

in place of my generally boring babble about how we've been sick, sore, rollercoastering and resting (and looking for a new home for sidney) i will just give you a couple of pictures of how jack has been spending his days lately.

if anyone knows anyone who would like a very active, loving, pug for their home and family, please let us know. and remember, he only shits in the house when you don't take him for a walk. and he totally outgrew that couch-eating habit like three years ago. he hasn't eaten anything but food (and one of jacks toys) in ages.

(isn't he cute? or at least weird looking enough to love?)

success

on thursday i threw a dinner party for tom's birthday. i made dinner for 7, plus two surprise guests. i have never in my life cooked for that many people. it was great and the food was great and then everyone sat in the living room eating hostess cupcakes and drinking and playing music. good times.

last night jack had a sleepover at sol's house and khya and o got a taste of the obstinate wee boy who loves to climb up the furniture. it is nice to know that i am not the only one driven crazy by his complete inability to keep his feet on the floor.

tom and i got to sleep in this morning and for the first time in weeks we didn't get a 4 am wake-up.

tonight we are returning the favor and sol is slumbering in jack's room. i can hear the boys chatting quietly from their cribs. adorable. lets hope it stays that adorable until after the sun rises.

i've got two days to finish this awful math class and then i can start working on making some money (more on that next week!).

today is the first day of spring. we celebrated with a few hours in the yard, tom fixing the fence, jack trying to help with his rubber mallet, and me cringing and trying to keep the kid from killing himself with power tools. we all succeeded.

what is this?!

so, we begin a new week with an entirely different perspective. i've lost those reserves of calm i had last week. i was at the end of my rope by 9 am. jack has hit some sort of height of trouble making what with the screaming, yelling and whining and the worst part? the climbing. he is climbing the chairs and up onto the table top, climbing the bakers rack to reach the tiffany plate, climbing the baby gates to get closer to his puppy, climbing the stairs at the playground and then throwing himself head first down the slide. at least it wasn't head first off the edge of the platform. 

i don't know how to have more patience. i don't know how not to go crazy running after him telling him what he can't do. i'd love it if he would just play with a toy, but clearly the knives and dvd player are more exciting.

all this sounds so normal reading it like this. what was i expecting? that we would miss out on the hard parts of toddlerhood? he is cheerful (with other people) and healthy and has slept really well (until now, hello 5 am wake-ups everyday for two weeks). i should be grateful. but what i would really like is daycare and a job.

i'd like to snuggle with my little punk in the morning while i get him ready, feed him breakfast and then take him to go play with other kids, under someone else's supervision, while i go pick up a cup of coffee (without having to fend off grabby, grubby hands trying to steal my cup), and spend the day doing something productive, speaking to adults and when i go home i'd like to have something to talk about other than diapers and language development. 

i am pretty sure i would be a better mother. but i don't know how to get there from here. i can't make enough to cover child care. or i could but just barely, we might come out even. i don't know how that makes sense.

i'm not sure what to do now.

i suppose i'll start by getting him out of the crib so he'll stop crying. wish me luck.

getting there

we've had our ups and downs. but i think i am climbing back up again. this week has had hard moments. today was tiny meltdowns, crappy coffee, judged on the playground moments, but the walking in the sun, eating tasty sandwiches, and snuggling with a ticklish toddler made it all worth it. i haven't felt that way at the end of the day in a long time. today was good.

and now my boys are at a slumber party and i have the whole house to myself. i've strewn my sewing across the dining room. television shows that no one else likes are playing on the big tv and i am even considering stepping ever so gently off the wagon for a minute for a glass of wine. we'll see.

things are calm in my head, i want to get up in the morning, i don't want to run away. i haven't been able to say any of those things in complete honesty in a very long time. 

things are calm and active and alive and it feels so good.

and we're back.

we did it! two weeks in mexico! on the beach! 

after two flights, a night in puerto vallarta (cosleeping for the first time in a year), many cab rides, a 4 hour bus ride (with 3 of the worst movies ever) (deck the halls, material girls and cheetah girls, dubbed into spanish and getting louder by the movie. the only one entertained was t who laughed his ass off through deck the halls, despite not speaking a word of spanish), and 8 days of fever and nausea and cough for me, we finally got to relax in the sun and hammocks with beers and baby and cowboy hats and bikinis and bulls and fiestas and birria and more beer and pina coladas and cards and plastic shovels and boats and waves and birds and crocodiles and fresh fish and some of the best people in the world. it was amazing.

then we had another cab ride and a 6 hour second class bus ride with 3 more awful movies (griffin and pheonix, or pheonix and griffin otherwise know as everyone is dying, DYING, boohoo, also, a bbc global warming special and the best of all of them, joe dirt.) more cab rides and a night of cable tv and room service at the pv holiday inn, 2 flights (one missed flight), 1.5 hours of customs hassle with a hungry thirsty baby and no food or water, sleeping cuddled together on the plane wrapped in brightly colored mexican blankets and holding tightly to a borrowed my little pony doll from the generous little girls in the seat in front of us and a ride home from uncle brian to our cozy little house in the snow.

and now we are home. trying to get our bearings and deal with all the tough things that come with coming home. but we are closer and cuddlier and tanner and happier than before we left and that is all we can hope for in a vacation.

my twenties.

i think i started the decade on 19th street in eugene. if anyone has any better idea where i spent my 20th birthday, do tell. it was a hazy time.

i went to the woods with the boys and my girls, made mud pies and made out with d. stuck with him for a while... sort of... things got a little hazy with that too.

i went to mexico and turned 21 in the electric bungalow, we had fires and hammocks and bad, bad, barra and cliff diving and raw fish and debauchery and i can't wait to go back again.

i came home and faced the music, then faced the art and i moved to the trailer park and lived in my airstream and worked at a homeless shelter teaching dirty little grubbins to read and then that got old and i spent a few months under the library teaching big grubbins to read. i lived in a driveway on the hill and the girls in the house all thought i was crazy and i thought that maybe i was too. i took meds and then stopped and then started again and then stopped again and that might have actually made me a little crazy. d dumped me and then i dumped him and then he dumped me and that when on for a year or so. eventually i think we just did it out of habit. what better way to spend your weekends than mourning or galavanting?

i moved into a basement and they thought i was less crazy, by a little. the swat team surrounded the house while we were being wholesome girls, and then later the white rapper hung out and they all decided i really was crazy.

so i moved in with the white rapper, proving i really was a crazy as they all thought. i let d dump me a final time and moved into the barn and despite the old dog and the dirty dishes and the awful band in the basement and the noises from the room next door i finally felt at home.

then everything exploded and i bought a plane ticket to new york and came back to an apartment on the hill with gay bourbon and we both passed out on the floor in our underwears many time. 

i tidied up the apartment and swept him out, i think he went to san francisco, my life is full of stereotypes. the librarian moved in and the receptionista slept on our floor til she went crazy. 

i studied logic and art history and the bible and read too much philip k dick. i went to new york a few more times and i slept with all the wrong people. except the cherry. he was sweet. and he had the legs of a soccer player and looked like forman on that 70's show. i spent the night in the dirt and saw neko case belt it out. i walked a lot. miles under my feet, at least 180 in 3 weekends. i raised alot of money too, although i was broke most of the time. i considered eating the arboretum ducks and settled for grocery outlet chickens. i wore socks on my arms and sleeves on my legs, short skirts and shaved hair, i lost my drivers license 3 times in two years and i never lose anything.

i taught english, hauled bathtubs and sold antique doorknobs, planted trees, wired light fixtures, silkscreened, made stupid little fabric flower pins, rented cars and wrote ads for dog shit scoopers and schnitzel. 

i camped with the best people in the world, and i woke up on belltown couches. i had an art show and took home a hippy. i decided to postpone my art career to save my reputation. 

we roasted a pig. i went to crow and the baranof and his 20th highschool reunion. i ended the night on the bathroom floor from a bad combination of dayquil and gin and tonics. i blame the dayquil. we went to new york again and he asked me to marry him. and then we had a wedding in the woods, and a baby in my bedroom and then i didn't leave the house much but i kept the kid alive which is a hell of a lot more than i can say for my tomato plants. 

i learned to cook, i learned how not to clean, i learned to embroidery and paint, i learned to stay away from artists and ethnomusicologists and guys who chew, i learned how to change a diaper and how to write html. i learned that merlot is awful, cotes du rhone can be great, and pabst blue ribbon is still way better than black butte porter. i learned that teenager really are as awful and everyone told me when i was 16. 

i learned that duck is tasty and that we probably would never have been caught if we had eaten just one or two of them.

i learned that i could actually be proud of my country and like my president. i learned that i really did want to get married and have a baby. those might have been the biggest shockers.

i learned how to blog and i am pretty much sure that no one has benefitted from that. 

i learned that i was right in thinking that i have the best friends in the world, and that i was right in thinking that my family is crazy. 

i learned i am not all that crazy, just a little and i kind of like it that way.

only 3 more hours left in my 20s. i'm going to spend them drinking wine and making out.

i have my fingers crossed that someone wears a chicken costume to my birthday party tomorrow. hope to see you all there!

the sin of greed

the cold air is seeping through the single pane windows next to my table, chilling my left arm and the beer i've propped up on the sill. the sound of history channel, football announcers and car commercials compete with the snore of my dirty little pug. there are blankets strewn across the mattress on the floor, left over from holiday guests and now serving as a net for my daredevil son as he falls backwards off the couch. when we move the bed back into the guestroom he is sure to crack his head on the hardwood floor.

i'm tied to my my computer again today, downloading and fucking around and considering how much time i have spent online in the last 5 years. enough time to write almost 700 blog posts, i'm almost surprised it isn't more. i suppose i am not terribly prolific, only wasting time.

the air here smells like burnt milk and tomato sauce from this morning's coffee and this evening's pizza delivery. every surface is covered in toys and books and gloves and games and fruit spills from the bowl and the tree is dropping pine needles too quickly as the minutes of the new year tick by. 

we'll put away the christmas things before i leave for oregon next week. i want to keep the festivity as long as we can. we need it this week, while mom and i go to the cancer center to see what needs to be done. as the reality of her situation sinks in and we realize that she will be very, very sick while she stays with us. while i begin to understand what it will mean to support her while i watch my boy learn about all the amazing little things in life. she will come here every month, like a menstrual cycle, throwing everything out of whack and yet reassuring... every month as the snows stop falling and the sun begins to shine again. as my boy grows taller and discovers the world outside our little home, my mother will be learning how hard it is to recover.

and what will i be learning? i hope there will be patience, i have very little. i hope there will be compassion, my mother and i have not had a lot of that in our relationship for the last 15 years. i know there will be math. and i hope there will be art. i am selfish. i want the people i love to grow and heal and be happy, but i want the same thing for myself. i want hours alone making things, i want long walks with my camera and no one to answer to, i want unhurried showers and a beer with dinner. and as i sit here wasting time, i think that there is a good chance i won't get what i want.

2008, in list form.

1. What did you do in 2008 that you’d never done before?

i made sauces and soups and salads and thai food and chinese and vietnamese and mexican and beef and chicken and fish and tofu and now i can make all my favorite fancy cravings without leaving the house. because godforbid i leave the house.

2. Did you keep your new year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

my new years resolutions for last year were to be a good parent, a better dog owner, get in shape and learn to cook. i think i am doing alright in the first two, skipped the third and rocked the kitchen like nobodies business. not a bad record. 

this year i'm aiming at applying for school, getting into shape, and keeping a plant alive. also, good parent/wife/blahblahblah.

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

khya! and our sol-y will be one year old on monday. unbelievable.

4. Did anyone close to you die?

some close calls, but i think we had a good year for keeping people alive. kittens on the other hand....(rip castor)

5. What countries did you visit?

does new jersey count?

6. What would you like to have in 2009 that you lacked in 2008?

more hotness. and a bigger camera.

7. What dates from 2008 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

july 26th (churpa & rich's wedding and a reunion of nearly every important person in my life), august 25th (jack's first birthday, rained out and salvaged by a propane grill, pabst blue ribbon and cori's mad skillz with the box o' cake), december 13th (churpa's keith richards 30th birthday party and a goddamn good time.)

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

once again, learning to cook. before this year i couldn't even confidently make hamburger helper, now i have my own recipe for peanut sauce.

9. What was your biggest failure?

i had high hopes for salvaging my relationship with plants. in the end my garden soil sat in a pile until november, my tomatoes went to khya's house and i have one sad little rosemary plant on the front stoop, barely surviving. 2009 is going to be all about learning to grow things.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

only the mental sort. and that one embarrassing issue that i had to have surgery for, but we aren't talking about that.

11. What was the best thing you bought?

my beautiful new fryes.

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

t, as usual. dear god he puts up with a lot from me. 

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

probably my own. i don't think this has been the best year for me as far as good behavior goes.

14. Where did most of your money go?

food and diapers. it is an exciting life i lead here in the g-wood.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

the election. holy christ that was a good moment!

16. What song will always remind you of 2008?

you are my sunshine, sung twice a day, every day, all year.

although right now that fucking wiggles tune from that stupid book that jack got for christmas is edging in. argh. evilcat, please help me change that before it is too late!

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder?
b) thinner or fatter?
c) richer or poorer?

happier, thinner and poorer. 

well, that puts things into perspective doesn't it?

18. What do you wish you’d done more of?

playing.

19. What do you wish you’d done less of?

whining.

20. How did you spend Christmas?

snowed in with the ones i love. also, drunk and high on sugar.

21. Did you fall in love in 2008?

over and over again. (gag)

22. What was your favorite TV program?

there wasn't a whole lot of tv in my life this year. good tv. there were a lot of crappy daytime tv days, but nothing i would consider a favorite. i really enjoyed the lord of the rings marathons with t though.

23. Do you hate anyone now that you didn’t hate this time last year?

the pediatrician who called my baby shrimpy.

24. What was the best book you read?

the best book? or the book that kept me from speaking to anyone until i was done reading. because i would not  call the twilight series good by any stretch, but ohmygod i couldn't stop!

25. What was your greatest musical discovery?

that i feel better when i listen to music? i seriously need some new music? please? someone? help me?

26. What did you want and get?

i got nearly everything i wanted. i am spoiled.

27. What did you want and not get?

a bigger camera. because i always want a little something more.

28. What was your favorite film of this year?

film? are you kidding?

29. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

i turned 29, and i, um... oh yes, i spent my birthday in the basement with the ladies.

30. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

more time with my friends and my kid. 2009 is going to include a lot more socializing with junior tagging along. i can't stay locked up in this house all day any more!

31. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2008?

conceal couture? if i can hide the muffintop and baby food stains i feel pretty good about it. i'm thinking i ought to be more ambitious than that.

32. What kept you sane?

text-messaging khya, askmoxie.com and sundays with evilcat in the basement.

33. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

the fancy ones.

34. What political issue stirred you the most?

all of it. 

35. Who did you miss?

kamari. snowball. k'mart. i wish her woods weren't so far away.

36. Who was the best new person you met?

sol! 

37. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2008.

always pack painters tape.

38. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year.

you know, these sorts of things always make me feel so stupid. i am simply not capable of coming up with song lyrics or songs to sum up situations. i feel like that there are people who can and people who can't  and i have always wanted to be one of those people who can. but here it is kids. i admit it. i am a shitty dj. i hope you still love me anyway.

(passed around every year, this year i saw it on all and sundry)

update: i just looked over last year's meme and found that i still have the same stupid sense of humor. in addition to answering half the questions exactly the same way, i even made the same dumb joke in question 21. it is nice to know some things don't change.